Chapter One
I was always surrounded by strong black female advice. It didn’t matter where I was, there was a strong black woman there ready to offer it. There was so much advice that I sometimes felt blocked in. You know, like the way clouds can sometimes completely block the sun. When I was younger, I felt that these clouds were there to ruin my fun. As I’ve gotten older, I realize that God actually put them there to protect me from too much sun. Just like the advice I received attempted to block me from making some serious mistakes.
My mom, granny, Ms. Carrie and even Crystal were there all along to protect me. If only I had paid closer attention to what they were telling me. Maybe I never would’ve fallen for Ross’ lies.
I guess it didn’t help that I met him at Foxbury Institute in Britechester during my freshman year. He lived in the dorms, one floor down, right by the elevator and across from the rec room. Anytime I walked to my room, I’d see him sitting in the rec room watching TV or playing video games. He stayed to himself a lot. It was a little unusual because most guys on campus hung out in groups, but he didn’t appear to be uncomfortable with it.
Anyways, I say it didn’t help to have met him on a college campus, because all my life my mother told me “Chantal, go out there and get yourself one of those good college men.” Or, “Chantal, what you need to do is go to college and find you a potential doctor, lawyer, or engineer.” I guess girls who grow up in single parent households tend to hear those words. Well, I know I did. So, I never considered the fact that a college man is capable of playing every game that a brother in the hood plays. I found that the only difference is one brother “spits” his game in “proper” English, while the other “spits” his in slang.
When I first officially met Ross, I wasn’t even remotely interested in him. It was the beginning of the second semester. I walked down the stairs on my way to God knows where, when suddenly I heard this voice. “How you doing?” The greeting was song-like. I looked around. I could barely see him sitting alone on the couch in the rec room. It was mostly dark and the only light came from the glow of the TV. I could see that he had a huge smile on his face. I instantly heard granny’s voice saying, “Never trust a man who smiles all the time. If he’s smiling he’s probably lying.” I ignored the voice. His smile had me captivated for a second, long enough for me to let down my guard a little. I had to see who the smile belonged to.
“I’m fine.”
“Where you heading to?” He got up from the couch and stepped closer. I could finally see him. Just a regular looking guy. He was mostly clean-shaven with a small mustache. Nothing particularly handsome about him. Nothing to make me want to sit around and hold a conversation, so I decided to keep it brief.
“Nowhere in particular.”
“Oh.” He extended his hand. “ My name is Ross.”
“I’m Chantal.” I kept my hand at my side. When he realized that I wasn’t going to shake his hand, he lowered it and began rubbing it on his jeans as if it were cold.
“Nice to meet you, Chantal.” He said, still smiling. “ Do you stay here?”
“Yeah, upstairs.” I paused. “Well, it was nice talking to you. See you around.” I knew that I was being short with him, but I didn’t want him to think that he could ask for my phone number.
After that brief meeting, I ran into him often. He always had a friendly smile on his face and he always greeted me by asking, “How you doing?” I didn’t want to be rude, so I’d answer then go on my way. Like I said, I wasn’t interested in him. I was too busy kicking it with my girls, heading to class, or studying. He started hanging around with some tall, lanky, boyish-looking girl that I assumed was his girlfriend. I really didn’t think much of it at the time, because I didn’t think that he was all that anyway.
Labels: Window Eyes Window Heart Window Mind - Part 1
